More details on the detailed scan.

Sorry for the brief update yesterday, it has been quite hectic these past few weeks. Well maybe not exactly hectic, more I really can’t get done in a day everything I want to get done.

The ultrasound was a huge relief yesterday. It has been difficult to really think this pregnancy will all work out. We have gone through so much to get here, so much loss that I needed to protect myself from any possibility of hurt. Not that it is an achievable goal, each step has brought reassurance and hope. What started as a way to inform our family and friends of our pregnancy, has turned into a way for me to let the positive experiences and feelings in. Try and shed the hurt and anger that has built up over the last few years and that I have been wearing around as a shield.

The last few days before the ultrasound, I woke up from intense nightmares that the baby was dead. Yesterday I woke up at 4am, full of excitement and dread. It is so hard to explain the opposing emotions, it was all quite confusing, even to me. As the scan began she didn’t move at all, then there was a twitch and we began to see definite movement. A wash of calm passed over me that hasn’t left.

We are so excited, it is a lot more real now; she looks like a baby. Head-on she looks more like Skeletor but that is just the nature of ultrasound imaging. Her profile is delicate and simply beautiful.

We have been asked so many times if we have a preference, my answer has always been, ‘a live baby’. Even though Bones was convinced it was a girl, he would have been ecstatic with a boy. It would appear that I was one of the few who didn’t have a clue as to the sex. My neighbour saw some 0-6 month old tights on sale and bought me some, most of Bones’s coworkers thought it would be a girl and my girlfriend’s husband thought it would be a girl because he could see me as a mom to a girl. Maybe my fears got in the way.

Thank-you so much for the well wishes.

Darch

The detailed scan....

.....and it is a girl......my wee pea is a wee she!

Darch

About last night.....

Coaching Special Olympics was amazing last night. Must admit I don’t have that much experience with the Developmentally Delayed crowd, most of my experience has been through Bones, (he works with Developmentally Delayed adults), so it took a bit of adjusting. Basically I have to be more vocal about my personal space and remind a few of the ladies to pull their suits up, other than that it was pretty easy and quite enjoyable.

For the next 4 weeks, (this season ends in 4 weeks, starts again in September), I will be working in the shallow end with those that are uncomfortable in the deep end. Last night we were working on pushing off from the side of the pool, gliding and blowing bubbles while you have your head in the water, pretty basic stuff. One of the ladies just wanted to relax, but every now and again she would show off by swimming across the pool.

The coaches and participants were very friendly. During free swim some of the participants were quite goofy which had me laughing pretty hard, and that only encouraged them more and on it goes. Looking forward to the next 4 weeks.

On a side note, the detailed scan is in exactly 1 week, care to make any wagers as to the sex? So far I have no leanings, Bones is convinced it is a girl. And you?

Darch

TMI - All about the mammaries....

So what is worst than bathing suit shopping, pregnant bathing suit shopping. I had to run out at lunch today to grab a maternity bathing suit. Basically it was an exercise in humility, or should I say being humiliated.

There was this assumption on my part that once I got pregnant it would be easier to find clothing. Not sure where it came from but it was there. Boy was I smoking crack!

Back to the dressing room, not only is there little to choose from, nothing could properly contain my bordering on obscene mammaries. Bones likes to remind me that women pay good money to be this well-endowed, I think they are called strippers and porn-stars and honestly don’t feel like being compared. But again I digress. Nothing could hold the suckers up, so I had to get a size larger, in a not-so-cute looking suit.

Now you must be asking what the urgency of requiring a suit so badly that I would only dedicate a lunch hour to the pursuit, well this is when the story takes a bit of an up turn…..

I AM COACHING SPECIAL OLYMPICS SWIMMING!!!!!!! ....tonight....

Yes I am excited. So excited that I can look past my humiliation of a saggy suit with breasts-a-bursting, (I think I will wear a t-shirt, it really is getting obscene).

Darch

Stupid conversations.....

…you know those times when someone catches a snippet and makes a comment, then someone else assumes their comment is judgemental and next thing you know both parties are so involved in being right they are creating what if scenarios that are bordering ridiculous and the original snippet, the possibility of common ground is lost and all that is left is the ridiculous what if scenario and the need to be right…..

…..ya those conversations, man they are just stupid.

Diapering decisions

We’ve decided to use cloth diapers. After tons of research we are most likely to go with the standard old pre-folds. They are the least expensive and both of us were raised with them and not only are we fully potty trained, our butts are quite superb. So we figured it should work well for our Wee Pea.

Yesterday we went to look at nursery furniture and check-out strollers. You know, diligently doing our research with the added benefit of getting us really excited about our family addition. We came across a display of cloth diapers. Bones started practicing how to fold them, different ways for a boy vs a girl. Who knew, something I missed in my tons of research.

There was a couple next to us and this was the conversation overheard:

NewMom: Oh look at the cloth diapers……

NewDad: Why would anyone use cloth diapers?

NewMom: ummmm they are good for the environment…

NewDad: *grunt*

Bones was focused on his folding practice and I was proud.

When we go on these excursions I am always struck with how involved Bones is. He has researched and declared what type of baby carrier he wants. He examines the baby gear, asks questions about it and talks to friends and family about what has worked for them. Most of the dads we know are very involved and are similar to Bones, it has been easy to sometimes overlook that this is not the case for all new moms. Can’t tell you how grateful I am that he is.

Darch

Happy Valentine's Day everyone

My parents always included my sister and I in Valentines Day. Even as we grew older I would get a Valentines Day card from them. When I went away to university my mom made me a crazy-quilt style heart that I still treasure, it hangs in my sewing room.

A couple of years ago, around Valentines Day, I asked Bones if he was going to give our children Valentine’s Day cards and gifts. He looked at me like I was nuts. I told him how it made me feel, it was a small reminder of just how much they cared. I went on to tell him that I was unsure when I had stopped getting cards, but that wasn’t all that important, it was more how it made me feel as child, especially after they separated and when I moved away. A few days later a letter arrived in the mail. A Valentine from my father, I was so excited. After seeing me, Bones just may have changed his mind.

Happy Valentine’s Day Wee Pea.

Darch